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Hey everyone~ Ohisashiburi~ Things did kinda got busy with school starting and all so I pushed this back a little -.- but here a new episode! Now that Niconico is ending, I'm getting motivated to translate all other un-translated episodes!! (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)و Including 2009-2010 episodes [which I'm wondering if there are re-recordings of higher quality?], 2013-2014 remaining episodes and of course the visual battle royale ep from way back that i barely started...orz We can all do a niconico marathon run once all episodes are translated lol.

Anyway, as previously mentioned I'm only doing the first hour of this episode for now, so even though the post title says VI parts, I'm only doing up to III for now >< I kinda want to work on other episodes first...

Again crediting this blog for some Japanese help:

Alice Nine Channel March 19th 2014 Part I/VI
00:00 - 20:28

T: Can i speak now? Good evening, I'm Alice Nine's guitarist Tora. Today we are bringing you the monthly Alice Nine Channel. And today is March 19th. It's not just any other day, everyone. We Alice Nine…just released our album! That's right~

T: Though…well you can see the posters here. Nightmare is doing their show right next to us so while preparing for their show, the poster wasn't put up here earlier! [not too sure?] No matter how you look at it!

T: Just a while ago, the staff came in to our dressing rooms for a meeting, or rather they just came to talk. So when they came, there were 5 posters in the room, so they asked, "can we borrow those?". Can you not set up the studio like that lol? Plus they were saying "we just pasted them, so they might peel off…" Come on….

T: Well next to us [Nightmare] is doing song commentaries as well, and since they are our senpais I shouldn't say this too loud, but our show is more interesting! Even though we are called a "channel" don't change the channel! Lets do this.

T: Oh you got your poster. Well as usual we have no idea what is happening today. So we are just saying our greetings to start off so let's introduce the two who are sitting here right now.

Sa: Yayyy!! Are you watching, mom?

N: Yayyyy!! Are you watching, dad?

T: Seriously…Today's no good…

Sa: Well next to us our senpais are doing their show…plus with a similar theme!

T: That's right.

Sa: That can be a concern

T: Yeah…earlier when we went to greet them…because it had been such a long time we last met, i was asked "Eh? Does Tora-shi usually use honorifics?"

Sa: it's been too long lol

T: Yeah it's been so long so I ended up using honorifics inadvertently. It was a little awkward for me. Anyway, our album is released!

Sa: yeah congrats!

N: Congrats!

Sa: Isn't that great?

N: Torashi grats!

T: Thank you. but for what? The album is our thing. We all created it together. We started working on it since the middle of last year. So it felt as if we finally managed to get it released.

Sa: Yeah that's right. We have been writing since summer.

T: Yeah, since summer. Though it's not yet a year, but we put in our all making this album. So everyone, have you listened to it yet? Though it is a high possibility that most of the viewers of this show haven't listened to it yet so it's scary…

T: Yeah…Oh, "I listened!", "Haven't received it yet!" I see…Ah thank you very much. "I listened to it in the bath"

N: In the bath?

T: That's a good environment. I see. Yeah, I kind of failed while dying my hair so my [hair] roots are kind of brown now...

N: You're right!

Sa: Don't Nao-san look shady today? You look really shady today!

N: Nooo… lol

Sa: Super shady!

T: Sometimes on TV, well we don't often appear on TV but when we do, you look like some idol's manager.

Sa: You really look shady.

T: Yeah, there are people like that.

N: Eh, I'll make you sell.

Sa: [skipped]

T: It's been a while since I've seen anyone wearing that kind of sunglasses.

N: You're right, not many people wear it.

T: yeah

N: My theme-wise, I was going for 'gentleman' style, and the lawyer hair style of Komikado in Legal High [some Jdrama]

T: Looks pretty different though. Plus that looks like a center parting [not too sure?]

N: Well anyway with our album being released…since you composed a flashy song KID, so I thought I'll go with this flashy sunglasses.

T: makes no sense. I mean that song is more suited for a club, but if someone like you is in a club it's weird. You are definitely somebody's manager instead.

T: Yes…my mic's a little shifted so hold a sec…anyway, Saga-san...

Sa: H-How is it lately?

T: Well nothing much lol

Sa: well recently our sleeping times are pretty different so i'm having difficulty knowing what you have been up to!

T: well i got addicted to Dark Souls [II]

Sa: Well Dark Souls II is now released, and Metal Gear Solid V is also getting released soon…I've been playing all the previous games so I'm following them…but I have to compose songs.

T: That's right.

Sa: I ended up being stuck in that!!

T: LOL but seriously do your job!

Sa: Ahh…the manager's pestering me "hurry up!"

T: yeah…

N: What's the hardware for them? [Metal Gear Solid i guess?]

Sa: PS3

N: Oh PS3! I'll buy it.

Sa: lol you will?

T: PS4 is already out but you don't even have PS3?

N: Lol no, I have PS3.

T: Oh i see. Yeah as usual we are hooked on games.

Sa: Yes

T: Nao-san don't usually play games do you?

N: Well recently I have been playing Metal Gear.

Sa: EH!

N: Yep yep!

Sa: Say so earlier!

N: I'm actually playing it. So now i'm addicted to this part "What's going on~!" [not too sure, i played the english version]

Sa: The part where [they] die?

N: Yeah that part.

Sa: Oh i see.

N: I'm playing that. Recently I've been playing a lot of gun-shooting games. Like Binary Domain.

T: Those are famous.

N: It cost only 980 yen at the second hand store. I decided I wanted to play that right away.

T: But seriously…please don't buy from a second hand store! Since you're an established artist and all….A visual kei artist in a second hand store…you have more money than the rest of them…

N: Nah nah…I'll only buy from secondhand stores.

T: Anyway, let's move on to announcements. [extra info on the commentary later on]

(around 6:56)

T: They are here already upstairs. I wonder why they aren't appearing here.

T: [more info on commentary]

T: Today is going to be long…

Sa: It is…

N: I thought I saw the schedule wrong.

T: I know…one hour is long enough but to go even longer than that…Is it possible to go beyond I wonder.

N: Plus Shou-kun reached here earlier than I did…

T: that's right

N: I wonder why

T: Well because this place is far. So it's troublesome to travel all the way from home to this place via train so he came along with me. [because Tora don't take trains lol]

N+Sa: Oh i see

T: Yeah that's all to it.

Sa: I see

T: There's nothing more to it. And more announcements from Alice Nine. [more info]

Sa: [tour info]

Sa: [on the boys-only live] However! The tickets have NOT been selling!!! The tickets have NOT been selling!!! The girls-only live have been selling well but…

T: The tickets for the girls-only live are almost sold out.

Sa: Unfortunately for the boys-only live…

T: Come to think of it, even though we have promoting our tour in general, we don't talk about the boys-only live much at al.

Sa: Yeah

T: Exactly.

N: Yesterday during the event [couldn't catch the location name], there were guys who came. He said he will come to the boys-only live.

Sa: really?!

T: That's a lie for sure…

N: It's true!! He already pre-ordered his tickets he said.

T: Ahh…i definitely want people to come…Come to think of it, yes we are doing events now. At the cinema etc.

N: I wanted him to bring more friends so I told him Saga-kun will go naked as promotion.

Sa: Well since only guys are present, if that is a good selling point, I'll go as Hard Gay [the wrestler?] or as Freddie Mercury.

T: But we will all end up with the looks Freddie Mercury [not too sure?]

Sa: Well with our chests exposed.

T: Yeah, I will like the guys to show themselves. How many guys are watching this. Maybe no one. Oh one? two? oh three? Oh quite a number

Sa: by the way, who is going?

T: Please say "You're going" if you are.

N: "i'm going!'

T: Oh he is. Oh just one.

N: only one?

T: Oh finally 2, and 3. At this rate total audience will be less than number of members.

Sa: Maybe our direction is wrong…

T: Well our direction…recently our talks are more geared towards the guys…at least half of them are.

Sa: That's true.

Staff: [asked something i can't hear, maybe lowest audience count?]

T: Probably not many for Alice Nine i think?

Sa: I wonder…

N: Maybe the one at Shikoku?

T: A true story lol

Sa: It is lol.

N: But the venue was small as well.

T: Well true. We will be happy if you just come. Why do i have to follow up with that question…Anyway, what are we supposed to be talking about? Anyway, after the national tour we have an Asia tour

N: [info on Asia tour]

T: This will be our first one-man tour in Asia. We will be going to different places. Honestly…it's scary.

N: Really?

T: It is!

N: I'm looking forward to it

T: It is something to look forward to

Sa: It's scary!! I'm mostly worried about the food…

T: Yes. Nao-san gets stomachaches most easily so you should be more careful

N: I'm training my guts now.

T: Oh nice going. Chinese food everyday.

N: Right. Piping hot food.

T: lol i see. You like chinese food anyway.

N: I love it.

T: I do like the food. Previously i was fine with whatever I ate there.

N: I want to eat chinese food everyday. The piping hot foods

T: lol what is the piping hot food you're talking about?

N: Well the spiciness is different.

T: I wonder why it's more spicy over there. Makes me kind of wish Japanese food can be spicier as well. I kind of want to eat super hot stuff.

N: Super hot foods…Taishoken is super hot~

T: Taishoken…you mean the ramen stall?

N: Yep.

T: Lets move on. By the way, are there anyone among the viewers who will be going for the Asia tour too? I'm also wondering if this broadcast is shown in China as well. Oh, you're going? Thank you.

N: There's another point of concern overseas. It's something that Japan will have no doubt, but overseas there are no wash lets.

T: Oh really?

Sa: Nao-san really loves wash lets. Do you like the feeling of water hitting your ass?

T: Isn't that a pervert? lol

N: Well wash lets is really part of my life…

Sa: Your life lol…

T: I don't remember which country it was, but in the airport, when i entered the toilet, there was a normal toilet bowl there, but there was a shower as well. Was that supposed to be for the ass? lol

N: That! lol I wonder.

T: What is that. I have no idea how to use it at all.

N: Is it okay to use it lol.

T: Sorry if that's not the way

Sa: I've never used it before so i don't know

T: What thing?

Sa: Washlets. Once i accidentally pressed the wrong button and got hit. I went "Ahnn…"

N: Eh? You don't use wash lets?

Sa: I don't i don't.


Sa: I really let out a sound

N: really?

T: I'm also not the type to use wash let

Sa: [skipped]

N: Really…if there's no wash lets…i think i won't have enough toilet paper…

T: How much! lol Oh okay. Let's do a survey

Sa: Girls seem like they're more likely to use them.

Staff: Let's see how the staff is

T: Oh let's do the survey for the staff. Okay, those who use wash lets. Ohhh I see. Around half.

Sa: I guess girls do use them.

T: But one of them didn't raise her hand.

N: Among us, I'm pretty sure Hiroto will go at max power

T: But see, everyone don't really use wash lets, unexpectedly

N: Eh?

T: They say, looks painful. "If I use it, I'll let out a weird sound" huh?

Sa: But when you let out a sound..

T: Okay a survey on who uses wash let

Sa: If you felt good what happens?

T: Alright click on the option!

Sa: What if it hits somewhere it shouldn't?

T: You mean…where? lol Dumb of me to ask lol.

Sa: Position yourself…

T: People try to position themselves?

Sa: Like when using the shower in the bathroom

T: What are we saying at this time of the day…

N: Ohh

[FYI: Use 42.3% Don't use 57.7%]

Sa: [suddenly] Mom, are you watching?~

N: Eh? Fewer people use wash lets?

T: It's fewer see. Meaning, 57.7 % of the people watching this show have dirty asses. That's how it is, though i don't use it too so i guess mine's dirty as well.

Sa: yep dirty.

N: That's why i want to bring a wash let overseas…but i can't possibly bring over something of that size….there's something called a handheld wash let

T: there's such a thing?

N: Yep

T: how much do you like wash lets…

N: they sell around 5000 to 6000yen so i'm thinking of…

T: But that's pretty expensive

N: So i thought i'll buy that and prepare myself.

T: Ehh…what are we talking about…we are making our own segments lol. A wash let segment.

N: a washlet segment lol

T: This program is not sponsored by TOTO [the washlet/toilet company] so is it okay?

Staff: Arauno [another washlet/toilet brand]

T: But that one's Panosonic right?

Sa+N: Yes Panosonic

T: Moving on, after the Asia tour we have additional live information. [additional info]

Sa: [info on anniversary live]

N: Fujikyuu is in Yamanashi?

Sa: yeah i didn't know too

N: Really? I thought it was in Chiba

T: It should be in Yamanashi

N: I see.

[skipped more bits on Yamanashi -.-]

T: It's closer than we thought

N: Shou-kun, the manager and I went to the Big Boy Restaurant, in Yamanashi

T: Oh yeah u did

N: So we ordered a hamburger set. There, you get free flow curry, salad and drinks.

T: Oh that sounds good!

N: yeah. We were all hungry so we ate the curry first before the hamburger came. Before the burgers came we were all full already lol. That was an unfortunate turnout. I want to 'avenge' myself.

T: SO you might go there again.

N: Yeah

T: So here it came. Since we have been talking random stuff all the way.

T: (read) Yo Alice Nine, what's up lately? Even though you guys aren't even a band do you carry your guitar case and ride the trains? It's scary but this seems to happen [not too sure?]

N: It does~

T: (read) Anyway, for this month's program, after 11pm today, all members will appear and talk about the new album 'SuperSub'. Hmm what? You will be doing all song commentaries for the album in SuperSub.

T: Close, but it's Nova. (read) But until then we will be doing related activities for this program. You guys probably know but the term Supernova on the album title refers to a stellar explosion of a…how do i read this? star?, that occurs when it reaches the end of its lifespan and radiates so much energy that it briefly outshines an entire galaxy, also known as Choushinsei …I have no idea at all. [btw, the niconico staff literally lifted most of that line from the J-Wikipedia so I translated using the english version of Wikipedia xD]

Sa: no idea at all

T: (read) Anyway, this month we will be carrying out this program entitled: New Album Supernova release! Alice Nine's Explosive! Yamanote-line [metra line] balloon relay game~!! What is this?!

Sa: When i heard Nao-san is appearing today…

N: no way…

Sa: I guess that's it

T: (read) You guys probably know that in the past the Yamanote-line game was pretty popular. Unfortunately we do know…(read) Following a chosen theme, all of you are required to say/write down a related item in sequence. In the first place, this activity was designed based on the element of explosion [not too sure]

T: (read) We will explain more after the set change. For now to buy time, we will play a song! Though the viewers probably won't want to watch we shall play that certain song. Let's hear the song intro from Saga-shisho

Sa: Alright, please listen to this: Subete e!